wake me up

I spent the last four nights staying out until (at least) 5AM and the last four days lazing about until (at least) 2PM and I have to wonder if maybe I’ve been doing this travel thing wrong up until now.

Koh Pha Ngan is this weird community—possibly the most touristy place in Southeast Asia, but also possibly the coolest for its parties and beaches and the type of people it attracts.

Necessary cliche: I haven’t felt this alive, or this bonded to other travelers since the Camino.

Last night was the Full Moon Party and I geared up with my new friends in neon and flowers and body paint like I was 18, and felt free, literally dancing circles along the beach.

But I also met up with old friends from Houston for the first time since I left, and the easy depth of our conversations threw me off in a way I wasn’t expecting. I spend hours and days with strangers, really, and these friendships follow the same path of discussing travels and hometowns and old jobs—scratching the surface but never going too far. So actually talking to someone about the nuances that have been monopolizing my brain for so long was therapeutic, and a bit jarring.

I don’t know. As I’ve just been discovering and rediscovering, travel is a weird mix. There are things I love, and things I miss, but I suppose that’s the way it always is, no matter where you are or what you’re doing (and I’d much rather be here).

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